New Definition of Wealthy

The U.S. has a simple plan: reform everything, go into debt to pay for it, and then tax the wealthy to pay off our debt. Great plan, except the numbers don't work out.

We need to raise taxes on the top 1.4% of tax payers by almost 50% to pay for all of the new debt we are taking on. That raise would allow us to tread water, but not pay down additional debt. So how does this work?

I'll tell you how it works, we redefine the word wealthy. Here are a few attempts:

• If you have a job, you're wealthy
• If you every had a job, you're wealthy
• If you have children, you're wealthy
• If you can see out of at least one eye, you're wealthy

And if you're wealthy, you're taxes are going up! Congratulations on being so successful! Now you can help us pay to reform the environment, health care, energy, and fashion (OK, I threw that last one in on my own, but hey, we need to look good if we're wealthy!).

You're taxes are about to go up, and not just a little. States are raising every fee they can (vehicle registration, inspections fees, camping fees, etc.) due to budget shortfalls. The federal government is about to raise income tax, medicare, and social security rates. But don't worry, you can afford it, you're wealthy.